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Write You - How To Turn Shoulds Into Want Tos
Do you remember when real estate financing meant you saved up enough to put 20% down on a house, and then you got a mortgage loan for the other 80%? Well, you can still do that, but there are many more options now. Here are ten of them.1. Gi
I made an honest list of everything I liked about the idea of going and everything I liked about the idea of not going. I didn't bother with the reasons against either. They were irrelevant.
<According to a recent Kiplinger survey the average American eats out more than 4 times a week. Preparing and eating more meals at home might be a better choice. But that may be easier said than done! The good news is that eating out needn’t add mor
You SHOULD write another newsletter. You have to!
The way I'm wired, the only possible response is, "Oh no I don't." It's part of my genetic code to resist. In the fight for dominance between me and the giant parent in the sky I will always win. I long ago gave up any chance of being a good person.
This doesn't serve me all that well. I realized a while back that I'm wasting an awful lot of energy with all that resistance.
I've found a way to trick myself-- to turn Shoulds into Want Tos. It's also a good process for any kind of tough decision. Here's how it goes:
I treat all the choices as equally viable options without judgment, and I ask myself, "What do I like about it?"
For example, I was torn about making a day trip to Boston (about 5 hours driving roundtrip). The reason for going was desirable (see a celebrity I like at a private party) but I don't much like going into the city and I'm shy about socializing with strangers. Did I really want to gear up for that? It seemed exhausting.
I made an honest list of everything I liked about the idea of going and everything I liked about the idea of not going. I didn't bother with the reasons against either. They were irrelevant.
Motivation can help you achieve anything you desire but how do you motivate yourself to achieve your goals?It’s not simply a question of saying I am motivated, if this was the case everyone would achieve there goals and fact is most do not.<
This doesn't serve me all that well. I realized a while back that I'm wasting an awful lot of energy with all that resistance.
I've found a way to trick myself-- to turn Shoulds into Want Tos. It's also a good process for any kind of tough decision. Here's how it goes:
I treat all the choices as equally viable options without judgment, and I ask myself, "What do I like about it?"
For example, I was torn about making a day trip to Boston (about 5 hours driving roundtrip). The reason for going was desirable (see a celebrity I like at a private party) but I don't much like going into the city and I'm shy about socializing with strangers. Did I really want to gear up for that? It seemed exhausting.
I made an honest list of everything I liked about the idea of going and everything I liked about the idea of not going. I didn't bother with the reasons against either. They were irrelevant.
<Recently I was asked if I had any inspiration for the online article writer and indeed I have. As an article writer myself I can say that it is not as easy as it looks, in fact it is quite hard. One comment, which I think relevant to this topic and
I've found a way to trick myself-- to turn Shoulds into Want Tos. It's also a good process for any kind of tough decision. Here's how it goes:
I treat all the choices as equally viable options without judgment, and I ask myself, "What do I like about it?"
For example, I was torn about making a day trip to Boston (about 5 hours driving roundtrip). The reason for going was desirable (see a celebrity I like at a private party) but I don't much like going into the city and I'm shy about socializing with strangers. Did I really want to gear up for that? It seemed exhausting.
I made an honest list of everything I liked about the idea of going and everything I liked about the idea of not going. I didn't bother with the reasons against either. They were irrelevant.
<In our cold reality of crime and technology, the romantic concept of meeting your true love on the bus has been somewhat diminished, not to say, entirely eliminated. Not only people don’t interact with strangers as much as they used to in the past,
For example, I was torn about making a day trip to Boston (about 5 hours driving roundtrip). The reason for going was desirable (see a celebrity I like at a private party) but I don't much like going into the city and I'm shy about socializing with strangers. Did I really want to gear up for that? It seemed exhausting.
I made an honest list of everything I liked about the idea of going and everything I liked about the idea of not going. I didn't bother with the reasons against either. They were irrelevant.
<Sometimes overcoming premature ejaculation is a matter of learning effective relaxation techniques and bringing more awareness into your sexual experiences.Interestingly, this idea contradicts a lot of prevailing wisdom around 'numbing' sexu
I made an honest list of everything I liked about the idea of going and everything I liked about the idea of not going. I didn't bother with the reasons against either. They were irrelevant.
When I was done I looked it over and got a sense of the values expressed in both lists. Those expressed in one list were clearly more the person I aspire to be than those in the other. By focussing only on what I liked about each I was able to lift my attitude. I gave myself full permission to make either choice and one was definitely more what I wanted.
I encourage you to try it with a tough decision or a nagging SHOULD. Let me know if you need some help and send me a note about your results if it works for you too.
P.S. I went to the party. The celebrity kissed me.
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